The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

I saw this quote today and it resonated deeply with me.

I’ve been struggling with the idea of desire.  I have all these dreams about how I want life to be.  I hear them whispering to me. To patiently wait until they manifest themselves.  A secret garden, a white gabled cottage with a conservatory, a sweet bakery nearby…a peter pan window for the boys, a basement office for Beau, a writing and painting nook for me.  Even a round door.

Before Pinterest, I kept a folder:303a0bc48da411e2aeb222000a1f9e7e_7I recently started a cottage pin board.  Enjoy it here.

But then I think…who am I to want such things?  Sometimes we just can’t have everything we want.  And it’s wrong to ask and hope…we should just be content.

Is that right?

On Easter I was reading an article about fear for the future.  It talked about the Israelites leaving Egypt and how they wanted to go back when they reached the red sea.  How their choice was to walk through a terrifying ocean or go back to the life of slavery they knew so well.  Familiarity vs. fear of the unknown.

When we sold our house I had all these hopes and dreams and now I’m feeling like we made a mistake.  Our old house wasn’t right for us, and I’ve always had dreams of something else, but now I’m so frightened by the future not working out that I’m being tempted back to what I had before.

It’s a large example of an overlying theme in my life.  As soon as something exciting and huge starts to bubble up I back down, afraid of success: writers block when I come up with a grand new idea for my book because I’m daunted by a rewrite. Self sabotage when someone wants to feature my art. An opportunity for travel, but I decide I just want to stay home and get some work done…but then I don’t do anything at all.

I think my fear sets in when I think about those who are less fortunate.  I decide success and beautiful things are not deserved by anybody when there are those who haven’t received them. I think about how much I DO have, and start to think that I shouldn’t want anything more.

There have been so many who have told me they can see the future for me.  They believe in the beauty of my dreams for me.  I remember telling Joey something similar when she was losing hope during their house hunt.  And now she lives in the adorable farmhouse I pictured in my head.

I’m even hesitant to blog about something like this, because I don’t want to sound greedy, but as you can see there hasn’t been much else to say on here.  We are in transition and the only thing I can think about is a house. I even bought a vintage Spanish crystal chandelier for it yesterday.  And have been studying how to grow bracken in my someday backyard. And today I’m going to research conservatories and sun rooms.

Meanwhile I’m living in my parent’s beautiful home, with a rose garden and a walk through the forest down to the sea.  My mom just told me that she’s so happy to have us here for as long as we want.  So I am going to try to be more patient in waiting for the right thing.  I’m not going to settle for the same comfort I already knew.  It may take remodeling and treasure hunting and fleshing out the bones of a run down cottage. But…

I can hear my future flowers whispering, “we belong to you!” and the beauty of that dream is mine.

10 thoughts on “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

  1. I think many of us struggle with the inner narrative in regard to dreams. I’ve always found you to be inspiring. I think you’ll persevere. It is just in you! I just bought one of your prints that speaks to me (In to the Stars). Reminds me to keep sailing for my dreams, and I will hang it right over my work space. :)

  2. Kelly: I’m glad I’m not alone!

    Kim: thank you! You are so so kind to me! I am awaiting an order of new paper for prints and yours should be ready for you within the week :)

  3. To dream of possibilities puts one on the path to success. Keep on dreaming and you may find that what comes back may not even be what you thought you wanted but it will be even better than you expected.

  4. This is a great post – if for no other reason than a selfish one…I find myself doing the same thing…shrinking from success, feeling greedy for WANTING when I already have so much and others have so little. I don’t know if it’s a female thing, a mother thing or just a thing some people do – but I like your new attitude of trying for what you want…buying the chandelier and doing your research…you guys will find the most perfect home for your family – and by perfect, I mean it will become the perfect home – it may not appear that way at first glance, but once you sprinkle some fairy dust around it will be magnificent – and I’m most certain you deserve it!

  5. Bridget, I just finished a wonderful book called ”Stepping Heavenward”. I’ve read it many times and every time I inderstand a little more of what this darling woman experienced in life. This is a diary that spans many years and all her longings to be like Christ. I would love for you to read it. It’s very old but maybe your library would have it. I can’t remember the author but I will find it if you can’t find the book.

  6. I have these exact same thoughts EVERY DAY. I don’t have a good answer, but I think your dreams are beautiful, especially because I know your desire to share the beauty around you with others. That can never be a bad thing. Yes, there are those less fortunate out there. But they have dreams, too.

  7. Bridget! It’s like you read my mind and made into a blog post! I so get it! I feel this ALL THE TIME. Thank you, thank you, thank you! The constant feeling to create beauty around us in whatever avenue that might be. Or maybe, just maybe this is truly how the Lord created us, as women. I think it is. Your desires and dreams are beautiful. I love watching, even if it’s from a distance, on your blog. It is a blessing.

  8. There is no good reason to ever stop hoping.

    I’ve heard amazing stories from two different people who simply knocked on the door of their dream house and asked if the owners had ever considered selling. And they had. And did. And they all lived happily ever after.

  9. You have so many beautiful things around you despite being temporarily house-less. I hope you revel in it, walk those forest pathways to the sea rain or shine, and soak up all the little things happening around you that you might miss out on (or that will be less frequent perhaps) once you get a new place—like 24/7 grandparents for the kids or more frequent dinner parties with friends. If traveling has taught me anything, it’s that you need a lot less stuff than you might think. Let go of stuff for a while, because you can.

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